My heart is broken once again… and the sad thing is I am the only one who knows about it. I cannot even tell anyone that I am hurting, I cannot let anyone know that I am in pain simply because no one knows that I am deeply in love with this man. Yes, I have a secret love… an unspoken feeling towards someone and I would rather die than to reveal to anyone that I am in love with him. I know I shouldn’t be feeling this, I know I shouldn’t even love him at all but what can I do, this foolish heart of mine just can’t be stopped. I honestly tried to avoid it, tried to ignore it, I even distanced myself from him but the further I try to stay away the more my feelings for him intensify. I’ve been in this road before, in fact I’ve been in this road so many times now but my stubborn heart just couldn’t learn. Love isn’t love until it is shared by two but I know in my heart that my love for him is enough for both of us. I did not expect us to be a couple, I did not even dream about us being together, although I wanted him to be THE ONE… my heart isn’t just ready to dream big, just to be close to him was more than enough for my happiness.
I had my share of little happiness, little cute moments together that maybe doesn’t mean a thing for him but means a lot for me. I thought that would be enough… Loving him in silence, I thought I’ll be alright with that but lately I am starting to realize that I shouldn’t be punishing myself in loving someone who can’t love me back. He may be the man of my dreams but clearly I am not the girl in his and I really believe that true love knows when it’s time to hold on and when it’s time to let go. Sad as it may seem but this is the time to let him go… maybe, just maybe this is just not the love for me just yet. Should I lose hope and turn my back from love? There’s a part of me that says, “Yes, I should ” that I should give up on love but I just know that I cannot… I am simply just a hopeless romantic and love will be on its way for me again very soon…
