Friday, June 29, 2007

When I was younger, I wanted a fairy tale. I'm a certified fairy-tale junkie and I've always love happy endings and I often envision myself of having one someday. Back then, I thought I just needed my prince to come and rescue me and we shall live happily ever after. I honestly thought a certain perfect love exists.

The first time I fell in love, it seemed everything was beautiful. I was so happy that I thought my dream had finally come true, I have my prince and my happy ending. But as years passed by, I was awaken by the cruel realization that my fairy tale is only but a joke. I felt deceived and betrayed, that my happy ending ain't no happy at all. My first love turned out to be the most painful event in my life.

Most often than not young loves are more hopeful... more naive... I was blinded by so much love that I failed to see that it was all in my fantasy. After my first heartbreak, I remembered crying an ocean of tears and I felt my heart breaking, literally. I lost faith in love. Nothing seemed to work out the way I hoped they would. Love broke my heart and shattered my dreams. There's no magic, certainly not a fairy tale. I guess my broken heart made me forget of what love really is. Love after all, is a mystical feeling, even in the depths of one's soul can never comprehend. It is something profound and indeed powerful.

It's a heavenly feeling to love and be loved. Some are lucky to find true love and be able to keep it. Some will just continue dreaming, hoping that one day love will come into their lives. But some do spend their whole lives waiting. I don't know what destiny had in store for me, but lately I am starting to have faith in love again. I am starting to believe that God only wants the best for me and He wants me to be happy. Love doesn't always carry with it a guarantee of happiness. It can be the most beautiful feeling anyone can experience but it can also bring severe pain. It can wound our hearts and leave it bleeding for a long time. If you're idea of love is something perfect, if you're looking for a fairy tale. I'm sorry but it's definitely not here. But hey, the pain love brings should not make us bitter but better persons.

Let us not be afraid to fall in love, as the saying goes "it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all." I've stopped looking for love for I'm so tired of the chase now. I just can't bear to lose again. My frail heart just couldn't handle another heartbreak so this time I'm giving love the chance to find me and I have immense faith in God that He alone has the best laid plans in my life. My ever after may not be a fairy tale but I just know someday I'll have my "lived happily ever after".

By: Emmyrose©
January 21, 2003


7:22 PM | 2 comments
A-Z Tag by Lelila

A - Age: 29yrs old

B - Band Listening To Right Now: none

C - Career: I’m an Engineer currently working as a freelancer and managing my own business.

D - Drink or Smoke: I used to.

E - Easiest Friends To Talk To: Ivy (my partner in crime) and Cookie (my best friend since high school)

G - Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms: gummy bears na lang

H - Have a Boyfriend: next question pls

I - In love: yes

J - Junk Food You Like: i'm not really a junk food fan

K - Kids: nope

L - Longest Ride Ever: Manila to Baguio, its just four hours but that's the longest I had riding in a bus

N - Names For Your Future Kids: Andre Jeremy and Eimee Kristine

O - One Wish You Have Now: to finally have a new laptop

P - Phobias: heights and lizards

Q - Favorite Quote: "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" Philippians 4:13

R - Reasons To Smile: text message from someone special, internet & shopping

S - Sleeping Hours: 2 am to 8am

T - Time You Woke Up: usually around 8am but i get out from bed around 9am :)

U - Unknown Fact About You: hmm mataray ako unknown pa ba 'to??

V - Vegetable You Hate: okra, eew

W - Worst Habit: shopaholic!

X - X-rays You’ve Had: too many

Y - Yummy Foods: Chocolates

Z - Zodiac Sign: Scorpio

Seven Things About Me

# i'm a bookworm
# i love shopping for bags & shoes
# i'm a starbucks addict
# i'm very talkative
# i may appear and sound very sweet but i'm also a bitch when provoked
# i work well under pressure
# i was diagnosed with lupus 6yrs ago

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6:03 PM | 0 comments
Thursday, June 28, 2007

Thirteen Things You Can Find Inside My Bag

1. Wallet
2. Coin Purse
3. Cellphone
4. Ipod Nano
5. Keys
6. Umbrella
7. Kikay Kit
(lip sticks, lip balm, face powder, perfume, moisturizer, comb, etc..)
8. Pen
9. Mini notebook/organizer
10. Digicam (you'll never know when you'll get a nice shot)
11. Hanky
12. Medicines
13. Book (I'm currently reading Sleepless in Manila)

This is my first Thursday Thirteen, I had fun doing this list..

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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1:49 PM | 7 comments
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
This is currently the soundtrack of my love life...


11:59 AM | 0 comments
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

1. What are some of your hobbies?

(in random order)
*internet surfing & blogging
*playing badminton
*watching movies/dvd
*listening to my ipod
*going to the mall
*hanging out with my friends usually having coffee at starbucks

2. Is there another hobby you wish you had?

>Yes, when I was in college I joined our mountaineering club but since I got sick I can't do that anymore.

3. Are you a collector? If so, what do you collect? (ex: stamps, coins, postcards, etc.)

>Yes, I collect books.. my oldest pocketbook was the first book I ever bought with my allowance back in grade school a "Sweet Dreams" pocket book.

I also collect pillows (by chance) my ex-bf used to give me pillows all the time.

I also collect shoes, bags, perfumes, papers, notebooks, pens, and winnie the pooh's collectibles.


1:52 AM | 5 comments
Monday, June 25, 2007
Not so long ago there was a time in my life, that I only need to close my eyes and I could see us as one. Sharing a life together, making our dreams come true.

I have always seen forever in your eyes.

We've known each other for so long, you were the one who knew me inside and out and accepted me for who I really am. You stood by me, when things aren't going my way. You have been my best friend and the love of my life. But I'm not really sure what happened but it felt like we've grown apart over the years and we just can't keep our love alive.

I can no longer see us together...

Forever had disappeared from your eyes..

And the dream that was once was ours is gone..

The special connection that binds us seems to be broken. We both know that whatever we had died a long time ago, but we chose to hold on. We tried to work things out but I guess its just the end of the line for us.

There were nights when I laid awake and I thought of the love our friendship brought. It's breaking my heart knowing that I've hurt you but the time has come for us to let go. No matter how hard I've been trying, the truth is just so hard to see. It takes a while to let go, even the ones that are not meant to be...

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11:34 PM | 0 comments
Sunday, June 24, 2007
I was tagged by Grace.. well, I liked it for I'm an online-quizzes junkie :)

Your Ideal Pet is a Little Dog

You're both high strung, hyper, and cute.
You're one of the few people who can get away with carrying your little dog in a little bag.
What's Your Ideal Pet?

Now, I'm tagging Nita & Julai.

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9:54 PM | 0 comments
myspace layouts, myspace codes, glitter graphics

In a little more time
I will be just fine
I just need to heal my broken heart
And give myself a fresh start

This ain't my first broken heart
I've been hurt so many times
But I won't dwell from it much longer
I've had enough and its time to let go

I have always believed in love...
.. in destiny.. in forever..
A fairytale junkie at heart
Somehow, I knew there's still someone out there for me

So many changes will take place
I'll be alone, but I won't be lonely
I know in time, I'll be okay
I will keep on loving...

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4:17 PM | 0 comments
Sunday, June 17, 2007
"You can run but you just can never hide from God."

Many times I feel like running away and just escaping from everything else. But no matter what I do, life catches up on me. Rambling thoughts are racing through my mind and I feel restless and exhausted. These are one of the times that I just want to hide from God because there's something that I must do, that He wants me to do and I just don't want to do it just yet... Its a leap of faith and I'm not sure I'm willing to take that risk again, I'm not sure if I'm already brave enough to go back to church and face all those people who have hurt me in the past. But I know I must and maybe someday I would.

Do you sometimes feel the way that I do? That you want to hide from God because you don't like what He is telling you to do? Do you sometimes just want to do things your way and take matters into your own hands because God's way seems to be unacceptable for you? But where do you hide from God?Remember Jonah, when he tried to run away from God? It only brought disaster and somehow we just need to trust God and even if His ways are against ours, we just need to lean on Him, after all He alone knows what's best for us.


Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence?
If I take the wings of the dawn, if I dwell in the remotest part of the ocean, even there Your hand will lead me, and Your right hand will guide and support me.”

Psalm 139: 7-10

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8:07 PM | 0 comments
Saturday, June 16, 2007
Your Love Life is Like Titanic

"Promise me you'll survive. That you won't give up, no matter what happens, no matter how hopeless."

You think that you only really have one true love in your life. And that you better to anything and everything to be with that person.
You tend to be very nostalgic about past loves that didn't work out. There are many secret feelings that you keep to yourself.

Your love style: Deep and emotional

Your Hollywood Ending Will Be: Bittersweet
What Movie Is Your Love Life Like?

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10:10 PM | 0 comments